Living Biblically & Other Shiny Objects

Our small group has been reading through Screwtape Letters. There have been some very interesting points of conviction during the reading. My favorite chapter focused on the art of distraction, the sin of wasting your life doing nothing, neither what you ought nor what you want. Very interesting. This is by far my greatest struggle, and have attempted to live more purposefully, which is not easy. Distractions abound. The tiniest thing can send my mind wandering, I feel like I am no more disciplined than a pet sometimes, always chasing anything that squeaks or is shiny.

One thing the book has done is create an awareness of the spiritual in the everyday, because the everyday is spiritual. Today I caught myself reading through a book “The Year of Living Biblically”. I was in an airport terminal with some time to kill and found myself skimming the book. Questions spawned surrounding what the author of this book had done. He was living out the Old Testament law. Jesus said that not one “jot nor tittle would pass away” from the law that even “whoever transgresses the least of the commandments” was guilty. My mind raced through what I knew of the law, no shaving, no bacon. Okay stop right there NO BACON needs capitalization. Now that is sacrifice, pork is freaking awesome, and bacon is the most freaking awesome of the awesome, its a big train of FREAKING AWESOME AWESOME SWEEETTTTT running you over with every mouth watering bite.

How close to the law are we supposed to live? I realize that the New Testament explains that the law is a condition of the heart, and that the Old Testament law was meant as not only religious law but secular law as well, laws that amounted to common law. How much should we take seriously though? I want to get that book and read it, but here's the thing, should I?

Remember the Screwtape Letters comments? It occurred to me that during this time with so many in need following the hurricane the last thing I needed was a detailed study of Old Testament law, was this another “shiny” meant to distract? I stopped, put the book down. I am not sure whether I should swear off shaving (pretty sure I’m not) but I am sure that Jesus stated the greatest of the commandments was “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, the second is like unto it love your neighbor as yourself”. I will revisit the law questions at some point but right now I am going to focus on others.

Wet-YourSelf-1000

This my friends is not JUST a conference ID badge it is much, much more!!! May I present to you one of the most amazing pieces of technology I have experienced at this years conference, the WetMyself1000. This handy little device makes you feel five again. It is just long enough to give you that oh so wet feeling following a trip to the bathroom. It functions in much the same way your shirt used to. It hangs in exactly the right spot to make a big splash! The most special part of this amazing device is that just like your kindergartner self you will jerk away at the first stream, then douse all those around making it the most fun you’ve had since pre-school!!!

I’ve been assured that coming next year is a device that hangs to the back. The new device is code-named ToiletDipper1000 - it will recreate the shirt-tail in the toilet fun.

Las Vegas, how I despise the....

There are so many passages in my mind that sound so eloquent yet when transfered morph into horrible prose. When trying to describe Las Vegas I sounded long speeches in my mind that sounded of Faulkner, great stuff, so poetic, but yeah they sounded like a cheap crime novel when I put them down yesterday. Example? The city is glossed over, full of shine and glitter, hiding the grime and sadness right beneath its neon surface. I should just call the city a “dame” and put on a fedora. “The dame was pure white innocence in a dirty city, can’t play in the dirt and leave spotless I wanted to tell her...” See what I mean, cheesy right? Moral of the story, never trust myself. I am afloat in cheesy phrases 99% of the time. Anyone want some nachos?

I really don’t like Vegas. I despise Vegas. Everything is fake and imported. I have yet to meet someone from Las Vegas. My cab driver was from East Africa. Waiter from California. I guess Vegas is a young city, and nothing was here before it I mean NOTHING. Coming in on the plane you get wide vistas of absolute nothingness stretching in every direction, its barren desert, then there is this city that seems a mockery of everything. It has Italian architecture without the class and scale of Italy. Okay here’s something humorous - Pirate Bay, Venetian - this is a DESERT!!! Why not at least go with the landscape and build something that matches close to the surrounding area. But that's what this place is isn’t it? Its the flash without the substance. Felt suddenly convicted. Am I the flash without the substance? Casino that I think describes Vegas the best The Mirage.

VMWorld - An Ode to Analogies

I will be using analogies with reckless abandon throughout this post, you have been warned.

I’ve been walking around the VMWorld conference in Vegas and have the feeling that I’ve seen everything at least twice - its like deja vu all over again, literally. All these conferences require so much work depending on what you want to get out of them. If what you want to get out of them is free coffee and snacks your in for a sweet ride, if you want good information and an idea of what is coming then prepare to be sucker punched in the back of the head. These conferences are like a high school swirlie, you get your hair wet but still need to wash it afterwards. All the technology buzz is deafening. Everything is “virtualized” and so you end up being almost virtually satisfied, but not really.

Couple of things esxtop session - very awesome. Still confused by having >100% utilization, how is this possible?

Conference photographers, I’ve seen one picking his nose, isn’t this bad for the equipment? Maybe he was trying to evoke a mood in one of the photos - will investigate for next photo shoot.

Wireless is to conferences as clean forks are to a restaurant, if you can’t even get that right you have problems, guess what has dried food particles on it - thats right you have made my list for insufficient wireless access VMWorld!!!